The Development of Character
Aristotle wrote, "all advancement in society begins with the development of the character of the young." This means that advancement in your life begins wth the learning and practice of values. You learn in one or all of three ways: instruction, study, and practice.
One of the chief roles of parenting is to teach children values. This requires patient instruction and explaining values to them over and over again as they are growing up. Once is never enough. The value and the importance of living by that value must be explained. Parents must not only give illustrations but also contrast the adherence to a value, especially that of telling the truth with its opposite, that of lying or telling half-truths. Children are very susceptible to the lessons they receive from the important people in their lives as they are growing up. They accept what you say as their parent as a fact, as absolute truth. They absorb what you say like a sponge. You write your description of values on their souls, which are like wet clay, so that what you write becomes a permanent part of the way they see the world and relate to life. More than anything else, you demonstrate your values in your behavior. Your children watch you and strive to emulate the values that you not only teach and preach, but also practice. And they are always watching.
You learn values by studying them closely. The Law of Concentration says that "whatever you dwell upon grows and increases in your life." What this means is that when you study and read stories about men and women who demonstrated the kind of values that you admire and respect, and then think about those stories and that behavior, those values sink ever deeper into your mind. Once these values are "programmed" into your subconscious, they create a propensity within you to behave consistently with those values when the situation requires them.
The core virtue of character is truth. Whenever you tell the truth, however inconvenient it may be at the time, you feel better about yourself and you earn the respect of the people around you. One of the highest accolades you can pay another person is to say that "he or she always tells the truth."
Much of your character is determined by the people you most admire, both living and dead. Who are they? Looking over your life and history, make a list of the people whom you most admire, and next to their names, write our the virtues or values that they more represent to you. If you could spend an afternoon with anyone, living or dead, what one person would you choose? Why would you choose that person? What would you talk about during your afternoon together? What questions would you ask, or what would you want to learn? Consider this as well: why would that person want to spend an afternoon with YOU? What are the virtues and values that you have developed that make you a valuable and interesting person? What makes you special?
You develop values by practicing them whenever they are called for. When a problem occurs, people tend to react automatically based on the highest values that they have developed up to that moment. We develop values by repetition, by behaving consistently with a particular value over and over again, until it becomes a habit, and locks in so that we come to practice it automatically. Men and women with highly developed characters behave in a manner consistently with their highest values, and they do so without thought or hesitation. There is no question in their minds about whether or not they are doing the right thing. Where do you stand with your values and character?
